When I came home from work last Thursday, I walked through Rotterdam central station, which was supposed to be business as usual. Only that afternoon I didn't see the normal grumpy stream of people going to and fro. Instead a band from the North Sea Jazz Festival was set up on the balcony and was playing like they were on stage in their own smoky back alley club. This created such a good atmosphere that a crowd gathered to just listen and be happy.
That is the power of music.
In light of certain death, all goals are futile. This doesn't mean that life itself is pointless. It is the posession of material or intellect as a goal for personal fullfilment that will always leave you with a sense of emptiness. All these will ultimately be left behind.
So what does that leave you with? Time.
Time to spend while you are on this earth. That is all you've got and it is the way you spend it which is key.
"So, your Holiness, now your priests are dead, and I am left alive. But in truth it is I who am dead, and they who live. For as always, your Holiness, the spirit of the dead will survive in the memory of the living." - The Mission
I am slowly becoming more and more detached from my inner emotions. Though still quite empathic to the emotional state of others and to the social rules and bounds, I find that the most basic of emotions, are starting to fade, leaving only a shell of my former self.
Could it be that my professional state of mind is starting to invade my personal environment? And what exactly is the border between work and private life? Or is it perhaps the result of meditation?
Whatever the reason, I am now faced with a numbness that I cannot seem to shake.
